Condoleezza Rice stood by the bulletin board hanging on the wall outside the gym of the super secret Trilateral Commission. Tacked there was a xeroxed announcement of a basketball game between the Trilat Hurricanes and the Bilderberg Express.

"Winner gets control of the Ramallah Mineral Deposits," she read out loud. "Wow."

Someone smacked her on the back. Paul Wolfowitz.

"Remember, this Saturday..." and he pointed his two index fingers at her as though they were guns. He had asked her to play piano for his nephew's bar mitzvah many months ago. Between meeting with international potentaries, talking to the press, getting coffee for the president, and taking dictation, she had a side business of playing piano at social gatherings. This made her quite a popular gal among the Washington crowd.

As Wolfowitz's spunky figure receded further down the hallway, Condoleezza turned from the bulletin board. She had promised to get coffee for Karl Rove and if she didn't start walking, she'd never make it at precisely eleven a.m. Being National Security Advisor to the president demanded conscientious attention to her appointments.

She knocked on Karl Rove's door. "Condi! Did you remember just a spot of milk?"

She walked in with his retro-cool re-elect Nixon mug brimming with java. Handing it to him, she sat in the chair across from his desk.

"Hey," he said, "I heard that little ditty of yours on the radio."

"Listening to Clear Channel, I hope," quipped Condoleezza. They both laughed.

"Of Course," said Rove, then he began to sing the tune of Condoleezza's recently released single, "Punish France, Ignore Germany and Forgive Russia."

"What's a National Security Advisor for?" she asked, "if not to burnish the old administration image as world leader in song?"

Karl nodded in approval. Like everyone else in the administration, he had a secret crush on Condoleezza Rice. And why not? She was smart, talented, and she had excellent connections with the oil industry.

"Well, Karl, I'd like to sit and chat, but I need to prepare an in depth report to the president on the various means of torturing...I mean...punishing France," she said, getting up.

"I hear they have weapons of mass destruction," said Karl, with a wink and a wicked gleam in his eye.

"Oh yes," laughed Condoleezza, "I've heard that, too."

"If you don't mind me asking," said Karl, "Exactly what kind of weapons do we need to suspect in order to effectively ignore a country?"

"Oh Karl," quipped Condoleezza, "You have such a sense of humor."

June1, 2003