Vera Borisovna works as a hat check girl at the Tri-Lateral Commission Gym, part of the underground complex known as "Cheney's Bunker" where the illuminutty ride the exercycles of power. We are privileged that she has agreed to let the Striporama carry her first person accounts of life in the Bunker.
June 5, 2004
Dear Computer,
Who needs the CIA when there's a guy like Doug Feith willing to make up intelligence?
June 4, 2004
Dear Computer,
As charter member of the Chalabi Booster Club, Dick Cheney has been trying to remove his Chalabi secret spy decoder ring for the past three days.
Poor Dick. This has been a tough week for him.
Yesterday, he was caught coming out of the bathroom with a trail of Halliburton toilet paper sticking from his pants.
What can I say.
TGIF.
June 2, 2004
Dear Computer,
For the past seven years, Ahmad Chalabi has been riding a pretty weird bike here in the Tri-Lateral Commission gym.
But then a lot of the illuminutty ride weird bikes. Maybe that's why nobody paid attention to the transmission towers attached to the radio device powered by the exercycle pedals or the strange assistant who kept muttering "My Preciousssss, my preciousssss..."
Besides, Chalabi seemed to be a likable guy. No sense making a fuss when someone like that is transmitting real intelligence to the Iranians while transmitting false intelligence to the Pentagon. Give him a break. He was just eccentric like that.
I'll give him credit where credit is due. After the day's transmissions were over, he threw great parties.
June 1, 2004
Dear Computer,
Ahmad Chalabi, long time member of the Tri-Lateral Commission gym, has recently been deposed in Iraq by members of a private military corporation and its Iraqi trainees. Now I guess there's some dispute as to who called for his ouster. The president says it was the Iraqis, the Iraqis say it was Bremer, Bremer says it was Brahimi, Brahimi says it was baloney and baloney isn't saying much of anything.
This is all very sad because Mr. Chalabi, like all of his friends in the administration, stood to make a ton of cash in Iraq. Given enough cash, a simple Illuminutty can progress to being a super illuminutty, like Bill Gates or that rich guy from Omaha who runs Berkshire Hathaway. It's what we think of here in the Bunker as the good side of war.
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Dear Computer, Who needs the CIA when there's a guy like Doug Feith willing to make up intelligence? |
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Dear Computer, As charter member of the Chalabi Booster Club, Dick Cheney has been trying to remove his Chalabi secret spy decoder ring for the past three days. Poor Dick. This has been a tough week for him. Yesterday, he was caught coming out of the bathroom with a trail of Halliburton toilet paper sticking from his pants. What can I say. TGIF. |
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Dear Computer, For the past seven years, Ahmad Chalabi has been riding a pretty weird bike here in the Tri-Lateral Commission gym. But then a lot of the illuminutty ride weird bikes. Maybe that's why nobody paid attention to the transmission towers attached to the radio device powered by the exercycle pedals or the strange assistant who kept muttering "My Preciousssss, my preciousssss..." Besides, Chalabi seemed to be a likable guy. No sense making a fuss when someone like that is transmitting real intelligence to the Iranians while transmitting false intelligence to the Pentagon. Give him a break. He was just eccentric like that. I'll give him credit where credit is due. After the day's transmissions were over, he threw great parties. |
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Dear Computer, Ahmad Chalabi, long time member of the Tri-Lateral Commission gym, has recently been deposed in Iraq by members of a private military corporation and its Iraqi trainees. Now I guess there's some dispute as to who called for his ouster. The president says it was the Iraqis, the Iraqis say it was Bremer, Bremer says it was Brahimi, Brahimi says it was baloney and baloney isn't saying much of anything. This is all very sad because Mr. Chalabi, like all of his friends in the administration, stood to make a ton of cash in Iraq. Given enough cash, a simple Illuminutty can progress to being a super illuminutty, like Bill Gates or that rich guy from Omaha who runs Berkshire Hathaway. It's what we think of here in the Bunker as the good side of war. |
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